Emily Dickinson

A Loss of Something Ever Felt I

poem 959

A Loss of Something Ever Felt I - meaning Summary

Childhood Sense of Loss

The poem describes a lifelong, almost pre-rational sense of loss first experienced in childhood. The speaker recalls feeling bereft without knowing what was missing, moving among others while mourning an absent sovereignty or home. As the speaker ages and gains wisdom, the sense of searching persists, now quieter and more deliberate, directed toward missing 'palaces' or a spiritual realm. The poem closes with a recurrent suspicion that the search has been misdirected all along, as if the speaker has been looking in the wrong place for the Kingdom of Heaven.

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A loss of something ever felt I The first that I could recollect Bereft I was of what I knew not Too young that any should suspect A Mourner walked among the children I notwithstanding went about As one bemoaning a Dominion Itself the only Prince cast out Elder, Today, a session wiser And fainter, too, as Wiseness is I find myself still softly searching For my Delinquent Palaces And a Suspicion, like a Finger Touches my Forehead now and then That I am looking oppositely For the site of the Kingdom of Heaven

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